Blog

life coach

Getting started

admin

“The hardest part is starting. Once you get that out of the way, you’ll find the rest of the journey much easier” – Simon Sinek

There’s nothing like the feeling of accomplishment. That sense of pride knowing that you completed a task and achieved your goal. While we look forward to that feeling, there also seems to be this area of haze that comes right before you get started. It often guises itself as rationalizations that deter you from taking that first action step. Something that says why you shouldn’t and/or can’t move forward. It’s pretends to protect us from the unknown but instead sends us back into the cycle of mediocrity.

That cycle kept me going for years. I almost believed that I didn’t want or need anything else from life. I kept telling myself that having a job, a husband, and a house was enough. However deep down I knew it wasn’t. I would run from the responsibility, from the spot light, and ultimately from the success that I desired deep down. It was only when I realized that I was self sabotaging that I was able to pin point my triggers and put check points in place to avoid falling into the trap. This process was difficult and even though I’m not a person that typically asks for help I realized that for me to unlearn this behaviour I had to reach out in order for me to move forward. I have been blessed to be surrounded by various other women in my life to trust, believe, and encourage me when I couldn’t. Just as the African proverb says “It takes a village to raise a child”, “It takes a team to birth a dream – Renée Ledford”.

When trying to achieve goals it always gets harder before it gets easier. This is when you need the most support. Whether it’s an objective ear, or a possible shift in perspective through a word of encouragement. Having a coach, cheerleader, and supporter in your corner isn’t a weakness it’s a life strategy. Who’s in your corner?

life coach

My Ex

admin

Let me tell you about my ex. You see he had me doing and thinking things I never thought I would. I would wake up with my heart racing, wondering if I’d be able to make it through the day. I’d get ready, with my chest feeling tight, unsure of if I’d be accepted.

In public, my ex would have me feeling as though the glances of strangers were because of my inadequacies. As if they could see the labels my ex gave me like, worthless, unlovable, a waste of time and space. Those labels had me believing that I always had to try harder, work harder, to prove to everyone else around me that they weren’t true.

In disagreements with my family or friends, my ex would say they never loved you anyway. Even if I was out with my friends my ex would whisper in my ear that my friends were more fun, more attractive, and that overall they had more going for them than me.

Although I was pretty being pretty wasn’t enough. Even though I was smart being smart wasn’t enough.

My other ex’s liked me enough to make me feel special but not enough to feel secure. In my head, I always knew it wouldn’t last, and that they’d leave too like everyone else. But this ex, this ex said he’d never leave, and I believed it. Everywhere I went this ex was there, always ready with 2 cents ready to put me in my place.

My identity became depression, weak (emotionless), bitter.

My ex’s name was T-RAUMA and we were in a common law partnership for at least 20 years. The most unfortunate part is that T-rauma wasn’t just with me, but is with and has impacted and crippled so many others. T-rauma often makes a grand entrance, but then unless he has a party and invites his friends; sometimes you don’t even realize that he’s still there. That the thoughts you think, the way you speak, or how you interact with others is because of the trace left on you by T-rauma. T-rauma’s job is to strip you of your identity and make you think that your identity is your T-rauma. Are you walking around thinking that something is wrong with you? I did too. Maybe T-rauma has been and is still living with you.

It wasn’t until I met the perfect companion, the one who renamed me and showed me what my true identity is that I could finally breathe. I could actually give and receive love.

My new identity became lovable, strong, beautiful, perfect, justified (blameless), free (from guilt, sin..), and SAVED

Renee Ledford

My new identity became lovable, strong, beautiful, perfect, justified (blameless), free (from guilt, sin..), and SAVED

All it took from me was a decision and a leap of faith.

Don’t ever think it’s too late, if you’re reading this then you’re right on time.

Just raise your hand and I’ll introduce you to YOUR forever.

Renee Ledford

life coach, Life Management

Perfect Timing

admin

Opportunities present themselves to us all the time, but do we slow down enough to acknowledge them for what they are? Or do we keep going on with the busyness of life and wait for the next week, month, year, or even decade.

We have less than a month left to this decade. What does that mean for you? Have you started to reflect on this past year to assess your current accomplishments? Are there some things that you’d like to wrap up before the end of the year? How about some things you’d like to leave behind?

There’s no time like now. Not next week, not tomorrow, not in an hour, but NOW. That doesn’t necessarily mean that you need to jump up wherever you are and do a full workout, grab a salad, or have that tough conversation. Mind you, if you can or feel compelled to then by all means do it. However what absolutely has to be done, is for you not to just make a decision but to make the decision to make that change.

Start with the first step – make the decision to make the change. Whatever that looks like for you. Sometimes we feel stuck, or like we missed our window of opportunity. While you may have missed an opportunity you will continue to be presented with others. What it’ll come down to is will you make the decision to make it happen?

Here are a few opportunities for you to take advantage of:

  • The Perfect Timing Planning Workshop on Friday December 27 @ 7:30pm (cost $20.00)
  • FREE 1 on 1 exploration coaching session (only 3 spaces available – $125.00 value)
life coach, Life Management, Self care

3 Keys to Combatting Overwhelm

admin

You’ve taken on a big project(s), a new job, or life is just hectic. The challenge is now you’re experiencing forgetfulness, brain fog, anxiety, irritability, and possibly even shortness of breath. This year I turned 40 and it seems as though it was a surprise to my body. Whereas I’m generally a busy person, my days typically consist with me waking up as early as I can, squeezing in some physical activity, then running through the day until I crash at about 12:30am it had never been an issue for me. Shortly after my birthday I began wheezing and breaking out in hives daily. Things that I generally enjoy or were considered my “self care” was causing my body to react defensively, whether it was preparing for an upcoming project or jogging. In fact I still haven’t been able to do a high intensity workout.

Sometimes you’re aware that you’re doing too much or overcommitted but sometimes the warning shows up in your body or is pointed out by others. Once you’ve realized that overwhelm is trying to take over here are a few tips on how to manage it:

  1. STOP – this may seem counter intuitive because if you’re overwhelmed then you have obligations that need to be done. Stopping doesn’t necessarily mean being neglectful or irresponsible; however it does mean forcing yourself to pay attention to yourself and your needs. An amazing exercise to assist with this is called a “Brain Dump”. This is my personal favourite it doesn’t take long and is quite effective. It’s basically taking every thought that’s in your head and writing them out on paper. No particular order just on the paper, it sounds like another task but this actually gives you relief. Here’s a great article on what it is and why it works https://littlecoffeefox.com/brain-dump/
  2. BREATHE – It’s another no brainer J. You have to breathe anyway so why not add a technique to it that can help you to create some clarity and regulate your mind and body. Some simple deep breathing actually does wonders. I used to think that breathing techniques were overrated but I’ve since learned the science behind it and have also experienced the benefits from it. If you really want to step it up a notch add meditation with a guided visualization, another thing I was reluctant towards but am glad I did.
  3. REACH OUT/UP – As the helper it’s easy to keep reaching down to help others and forget and/or neglect yourself. While all three of these steps are important step three is critical for maintaining a healthy level of stress. This could be as simple as sharing your feelings and/or concerns with a friend or seeking some assistance from a coach or therapist. Sometimes the overwhelming feelings are being triggered from more than a task list or seeming insurmountable responsibilities but need to be addressed with a professional to help you get back on track.

Even though I still have times when I feel overwhelmed this list is what’s kept me consistently moving forward.

All the best to tackling the overwhelm monster in your life.

Live intentionally!